Are We There Yet?
Do you remember being 10 years old and going on a cross-country drive with your parents to Disneyland? Remember how exciting the first, oh, 45 minutes was because you were going to see Mickey Mouse and get hopped up on funnel cakes and snow cones? And how boring the next FIFTEEN HOURS was while you were trapped in the back seat next to your siblings listening to your parents absolutely butcher all of the lyrics to R.E.M’s “It’s the End of the World As We Know It”?
Remember this conversation starting right around minute 46 into the drive?
“Are we there yet?”
“No, not yet.”
After asking the same question every minute on the minute for the next 686 minutes…
“Are we there yet?”
“NO!”
“When are we getting there?”
“WE’LL GET THERE WHEN WE GET THERE!”
That’s exactly what happens when you start a diet without any firm goals or timelines in tact.
Goal Setting: How Long vs. How Far
Depending on the child in the back seat and the parent in the front seat, there were typically two options for calming the impending mental breakdowns that were quickly developing in this wood-paneled station wagon slash Alcatraz on wheels – your parents could either tell you how much further you still had to travel, or they could tell you how much longer the drive was going to last.
“We’re going to need gas again in another 100 miles, so we can all get out and pee again. Then it’s just another 150 miles and we’re there!”
Or,
“Just another hour! That’s only 12 more plays of Billy Joel’s “We Didn’t Start the Fire”! Maybe this time your dad will try to sing it in his baritone voice!”
*Editor’s note: I apologize for the 10 hours of therapy I just inflicted on you by dragging up these memories.
How Long
The first option to avoiding lots of kicking and screaming by the time you’re a week into your diet is to establish how long you’re going to be dieting for. This is my personal favorite approach because like many people, I function much better under the pressure of a deadline. For some people it’s a wedding dress they have to fit into, for others it’s a class reunion, and for some it’s just the ability to tell your favorite pizza delivery guy “I’ll see you in 12 weeks!”
How Far
The other option is to define what your specific end goal is that you’re striving for – it could be a particular bodyweight, a pant size, whatever is motivating you. This particular method comes with two disadvantages.
The first is that you have to set an end that’s achievable in a reasonable time frame – starting your diet at 300lbs and saying “I’m not going to stop until I’m 150lbs!” is sort of like telling 10-year-old me that we’ll stop to pee once we get to Georgia, but we’re currently in Iowa – here’s going to be lots of whining and complaining and a pretty solid 100% chance that somebody is going to pee in the back seat.
The other disadvantage is that sometimes, delays happen that aren’t in your control, which can make a seemingly routine trip take much longer than originally expected. I not so fondly remember seeing signs that said “next exit 1 mile” only to spend the next 3 hours stuck in gridlock because a car ahead of us decided that yes, Dukes of Hazzard was definitely factual and he can totally ramp his Dodge Charger over the semi truck in front of him carrying 300 chickens, allowing every 10 year old on that highway to learn that feathers go everywhere when they’re force-fed through a 400-horsepower engine.
Make a Deadline and Stick to It
Whichever method you end up choosing for your goal setting, set an end and hold yourself to it. And when it’s over, treat yourself to a Frosty and a pee break – you’ve earned it.
Are you having a hard time setting a goal and sticking to it? We can help!
